In the category of "why didn't I think of that" here are two new books recently released:
Fifty Shames of Earl Grey by Fanny Merkin and My Favorite Fangs, The Story of the von Trapp Family Vampires by Alan Goldsher.
These are real books. Mmmmmmmmmmm.
My Favorite Fangs even comes with a reader's guide.
And the full title to Fifty Shames of Earl Grey is Fifty Shames of Earl Grey: A Parody. Really?